Roller Coaster of Life

Posted in Uncategorized on March 1, 2014 by stintedvisions

Things haven’t always been perfect.  I decided to delete my past posts and start fresh.  A new chapter is ahead, and I’d rather not have such “whiney” things around.  So here’s to new beginnings and whatnot.


January I started a job working at Sea World’s Discovery Cove in the dive shop, over night, as a Maintenance Helper (I hate the title so I’m going to use Assistant to make it sound less like I’m incompetent), or as they call it a “shallows”.  The first few weeks I really didn’t mind the job, it was fun new and exciting, the people were nice and the job really didn’t take any brain power.  Well that’s where the problem is now, it takes so little effort that for someone who naturally worries over nothing, I know have nothing better to do than to listen to music and retreat deep inside of my head and make myself crazy over things I have no power over.  Add to this, that pressure washing rocks of algae and dolphin turds, and not really a whole lot else, or room for learning more.  I’m rapidly growing tired of it.  I know that in 90 days I can put in my application to become a diver go through the entire interview process again and maybe hopefully fingers crossed get the promotion, but I’m barely at the half way point in my probationary period, and of the things I’ve seen and done, it’s really just more of the mindless zombie drone work that takes little to no effort or brain power.  After I became a diver even, then what?  I stay a diver for however long, and then become a senior diver, which really doesn’t mean anything from what I’ve observed, you still do the same work the same amount of time.  Six people have put in their two weeks notice since I was hired in February.  That’s more than half of the divers there, and even more are really just waiting to get picked up for something else. So if that’s any indication, do I really want to stay with this job?


Recently I started looking into the option of joining the military again.  If you had asked me two years ago if I would even considered it, my answer wouldn’t have been no or even hell no, but “over my dead fucking body will I ever do this shit again”.  Well it’s been two years of struggling with bills and trying to dig myself out of debt and not really succeeding.  So I looked at my options, the Navy told me I’d have to submit a packet in order to even see if I could join and it would probably be ten months before I got a final answer that would probably be no.  The Air Force as always is unreliable and didn’t call me back.  I didn’t bother with the Army or Marines, and so I called the Coast Guard.  I had tinkered with the idea in my head that it’s something I could have done was leave the Navy and go Coast Guard to work on the same system I did in the Navy, but never followed through.  So I found myself thinking about the Navy again, although as much as I didn’t want to join the Navy again, I’ve felt that I’ve been out of options financially.  So after the Navy told me that it’s not likely (I don’t have ten months to wait… bills don’t have a pause button) or that my other option was Navy reserves which is sort of my back up plan now, if the Coast Guard falls through.  Anyway, I called the Coast Guard, and they told me the same sort of story as the Navy, that I’d have to put in a packet to see if I could join, but instead of ten months it was ten days to have an answer back (or so it says in the manual…. whether that actually happens or not remains to be seen), so the packet is mostly together… or was together until they told me that I should get some character reference letters together (would have been nice if they told me that from the start, I’d probably have my packet together by now, but I digress).  So I’ve gotten in contact with some of my supervisors from the Navy who said they’d happily write the letters for me, so I’ve got that going for me which is nice.  Now it’s just the hurry up and wait… to wait to have an answer, and then wait some more.  The wheels are in some form of motion, although it might not be as fast as my fiance and I would like, it is a forward motion.  We’re both hopeful that we get a yes back since the Coast Guard has seemed the most promising avenue we’ve found.  I however am finding it hard to stay optimistic about it.  Sure the recruiters seem optimistic, they even seem happy to have me join their ranks, and are excited (for some reason) to put my packet together since none of them have done one before.   Still though, I remain cautious, in order to not get my hopes up too high that they’re dashed on the rocks and I’m crushed.  I want to be excited though, I want this fairly badly, it would be good for my fiance, myself and our little blueberry sized baby.


Yes, my fiance is pregnant.  She was terrified to tell me because she didn’t think I’d be excited since I had told her before that I wanted to wait until after college to have kids.  While it’s true, if I could plan my perfect world, I would finish college and have a child with her.  However, that’s not possible, and things happened as they did, and I’m incredibly excited and happy to have a baby with her.  It’s also kind of stressful considering our financial situation, but hopefully within the next month we’ll have answers on that.  We’ve already started buying stuff for the baby.  I spotted a monkey rocker thing from Fisher Price I thought was awesome, so naturally we got that.  We’ve already picked out a crib, and she’s gone and picked out strollers and car seats and the like.  I haven’t done that much looking for stuff, but when we know whether it’s going to be a boy or a girl, I think I’m going to be all over that.


So that’s the news on the job front.  The college front has kind of come to a screeching halt.  It’s impossible for me to get financial aid for a semester, so that leaves me roughly 5-6  months without money.  This was no bueno and obviously I had to get a job in order to go on with my life.  I’ve been kind of tired of getting the run around with college anyway, so… I’m taking a break.  After getting the rest of our lives situated I’ll be attending college once again, probably not on a full time basis, but I will be taking classes here and there, we’ll start with one and see how that goes working a full time job and being underway and what not (internet can be dodgy on a ship as I’ve experienced from the Navy, so if the Coast Guard is any of the same, I know what to expect).  Actually, a lot of the things in our lives are on hold.  Our lease is up at the end of March, and we’re hesitant to find a month by month lease as they tend to be expensive, so we’re kind of at the mercy of the Coast Guard and/or our room mate.  Hopefully we’ll have answers before then, but everything is up in the air right now and it’s kind of unsettling, we don’t know where we’ll be living in April, what school we’ll be attending, what jobs we’ll have, where life will take us at all, and it’s kind of making me nervous that we have absolutely no answers right now.  If you’re just tuning in though, I’m working at getting my BS in Electrical Engineering with a Specialization/Minor in Robotics.


I think that’s all the updates though, not that there is anyone else that reads this but my fiance, but hey… writing things down takes them off your mind and is supposed to put you at ease, right?